We see friends, co-workers and families worn down and overloaded. People are tired and many of us are feeling the effects of cultural fatigue. Emotions are frayed. When the pandemic hit, our lives became uncertain. Mental health experts have reported an increase in depression and anxiety. Lately my clients have been asking how to strengthen their commitment to the mental

health and well being of their colleagues. They are compassionate leaders who do not want to stand by and do nothing. What can they do to make things better?

Last month Sun Life Financial held a forum with their CEOs, presidents, and C-suite executives to underscore their commitment and responsibility to support the mental health of their employees. Jacques Goulet, President, Sun Life Canada and Lumino Health, said, “As leaders of some of Canada’s largest workplaces, we have the responsibility to act. We must set the tone from the top and ensure our organizations are psychologically safe.”

So where do you begin if you have the same commitment as Sun Life to your employees’ mental health?

The first step is to create dialogues with your leaders about what it means to make mental health a priority. Next you need to figure out how you will measure your success. If you’re not a mental health organization, I suggest that you consult with a mental health expert first. (If you’re a financial institution you wouldn’t hire social workers to run your audits.) Get the right players on your team. Sun Life, for example, partnered with the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health for their forum.

Here are a few ideas to start your conversations about how to look out for your colleagues. It’s a first step. The next step is strategizing how to transform your knowledge and insights into actions.

Mental health

How do we define mental health?
What conversations do we need to have with our colleagues about their well being?
What resources do we provide for our employees’ success and mental health?
Do we have reasonable performance expectations?
How do we promote genuine work life balance?
What do we do to personally show our colleagues we appreciate them? How often does that happen?
How do we show compassion? What are examples?
What do we do to inspire our employees?
What do we need to do more of to support our employees’ mental health?
What additional resources such as wellness classes, workshops, employee assistance programs, mental health consultants and therapy resources do we have available in our organization?

The post Safeguarding Your Employees’ Mental Health appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

Be Pro-Active

If you recognize signs of burnout on your team, try to refrain from the impulse to jump in and do their job for them. It can certainly be tempting to take care of something yourself – it’s no fun to watch others struggle, especially if you know how to do their task yourself. But picking up others’ workloads is not a viable long-term solution, and if you try to rescue everyone, you’ll wind up overwhelmed and burnt out yourself. Instead, work with them to see if you can develop a solution that works for both of you. Find out what they’ve done in similar situations when they felt overloaded and what’s helped them cope. Be curious about what they need to feel more supported and help them uncover ways to build those things into their work lives.

Practice Self-Reflection

Perhaps one of the best strategies to prevent burnout is to take stock of what your team is experiencing and your contributions as a leader to solutions and problems. It will always be easier to be a great leader when everything is running smoothly, and people are happy. The challenge for a leader in times of crisis is to practice balancing the needs of clients, the organization, and the workforce.

Recently, I met with a CEO on a new initiative she is launching that’s a significant change for the organization. When we spoke, she said she was ready to kick off the program in January and meet with her leadership team that week. She wants to talk with them first because she’s concerned about asking employees to take on a new project with the added burdens on their already stressed lives. With the rise of COVID-19 cases, shutdowns, schools closing, and most working from home, she knows her workforce is worn thin.

As a CEO practicing awareness of burnout, she is also naming that burnout and engaging others in a collaborative solution. Instead of forging ahead with a new project she is excited about, she’s engaging her leadership team in a conversation about timing, planning, and assessing energy levels so she doesn’t burn out her team on a project that could wait until spring. By balancing what is best for their customers, the organization, and their employees, she sets up her organization for sustainability, growth, and success.

Continuing to add more and more expectations on colleagues who may already be sinking comes at a price. Their emotional and mental health, family life, and general health and well-being could all be impacted. When the crisis is over, they will remember what leaders did or didn’t do, and it will affect their trust and influence how they perform in the future. By filling up your team member’s cups when they are running low, you invest in your organization, customers, and team members’ future health.

The post Leading With Burnout in Mind II appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

Burnout looks different from individual to individual, and stressors may range in diversity. One person’s stress is another’s pastime. No matter the cause, burnout needs to be addressed because it will worsen if ignored or repressed. It can even feel productive at times but don’t be fooled. When anyone continues to run on empty, they will eventually run out of fuel.

Awareness

The first step to reducing burnout is learning to spot it. People have a myriad of ways of expressing their exhaustion and fatigue. They may be overly sensitive, taking increased sick time, or expressing somatic complaints like headaches, GI issues, or tense muscles. You may notice they are experiencing insomnia or oversleeping, have difficulty concentrating, or make more mistakes at work. They might be overly emotional, forgetful, short-tempered, or they may even disclose to you that they are so stressed they saw their physician who prescribed medication to cope. Try spotting signs of possible burnout in those around you by just bringing a simple awareness of these symptoms with you in your daily life.

A key piece of healthy awareness is non-judgment. When we practice awareness, a sense of curiosity coupled with non-judgment will reward you with the best results on your return.

Recognize and Engage

If leaders recognize their colleagues are on edge or experiencing burnout, the next step is to voice that recognition compassionately. You can start by letting them know you’re interested in what’s going in their life. Practice reflective listening by paying attention to what they tell you and showing them you care and hear them. When we do this, we don’t have to say, “I understand” because we express it in how we are listening to them.

This presence isn’t always easy and doesn’t come naturally to everyone. If you don’t have time to listen or are just going through the motions, you will do more harm than good. We know intuitively when people aren’t listening to us, and we shut down. Practice showing authentic compassion for the speaker, and keep your focus on what they’re telling you even if it’s hard to hear about their struggles.

In the next blog, I focus on ways to get ahead of burnout while it’s still manageable, and I address preventative strategies to target the root causes of burnout.

The post Leading With Burnout in Mind I appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

• Take media breaks: Make space and time in your life away from consuming the news, media, and even social media. When we observe trauma or stressful events, our mirror neurons cause our brains to believe we are participating directly in the event. We don’t realize this when it’s happening, but it can wreak havoc on our mental health if we don’t take regular breaks. Sometimes people prefer only to watch the news on certain days of the week. Find your balance with consuming media so that you feel informed but not overburdened by it.

• Connect with others: Call, video message, or take a walk with your friends and family. Share your concerns with others you trust. In this socially distant reality, it’s more important than ever to help grow your valued relationships and share your experiences, thoughts, and emotions. If you have tried this and feel you aren’t getting the responses or results you need, it could be beneficial to talk to a professional therapist.

• Nurture your body and spirit: Eat a well-balanced diet, practice healthy sleep habits and exercise. Take time every day to stretch, practice deep breathing, pray or meditate, and to drink enough water. Be mindful of your alcohol and substance intake.

• Set yourself up for success: We all have areas of our lives that can feel sluggish. Whether it’s getting back in the habit of eating well or exercising, it can be tough to come out of a slump. To help, make small goals to set yourself up for success. Instead of making drastic changes all at once, focus on something simple at first. For example, instead of running five miles when you haven’t even jogged up your stairs for two weeks, try running one mile instead. This way, you can feel good about hitting your goal and will feel excited about continuing your progress down the road.

• Make time for humor: Laughter always helps us to calm our minds and feel better on a physical and emotional level. Please don’t underestimate the power of humor. Use it to inspire and motivate yourself and those around you.

• Take stock of your accomplishments: This is a time to think about what you’ve accomplished that you’re proud of. When we’re overly stressed it’s easy to forget what we’ve achieved and get lost thinking about losses. Practice gratitude. Take a few minutes every day to note three things you’re grateful for. Don’t give up on using your standard stress busters. They may not get the same results they do in better times but they’re still a crucial resource to tap into. Don’t be hard on yourself if they don’t ease all of your tension.

• Go off in a new direction: If you’re struggling to get motivated it may be tough to pull this one off. Test out a new idea of how to cope. Be bold. We’re in a new world so why not try something completely different to reduce your stress? Be an explorer. Use your creativity to challenge and surprise yourself. If it doesn’t work it’s not the end of the world. It’s an experiment. Remember not to expect perfection. You’re on a new learning curve so give yourself some slack or you’ll end up stamping out the joys of learning something new.

• Share what works for you: Be charitable. Think about how you can share with others the personal problems you’ve had to sort through and what’s worked to get ahead of your stress. Maybe you were feeling crabby with your partner or your kids or homeschooling was driving you nuts or you just wanted an hour to yourself and everyone’s at home and seems to want something from you. How did you turn things around?

• Remember that it’s better to give than receive: Feel free to email me what works for you to reduce your stress and I’d be happy to share your ideas to help others while respecting your anonymity.

The post Burned Out? Do This! appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

In this crisis event, our standard ways of coping aren’t necessarily available to us. We’re stressed, and we can’t go to the gym to burn off that energy or meet friends in person to receive the connection and support we once relied on. Typically, people tend to deal with stress from a crisis in one of three ways:

• Resilience: A crisis hits, but I’m resilient and come up with new ways to cope and enjoy life. I can’t go to my favorite restaurant, but maybe I take up cooking. I take guitar or Spanish classes online and spend lunchtime with my kids instead of my colleagues. I challenge myself to come out of a crisis as a stronger person and find a way to thrive.

• Stagnation: Life turns upside down, and I’m treading water. I’m okay, but I feel off-center, vaguely empty, and disoriented. Maybe I’m overeating, watching TV instead of going for a walk, and the extra pounds or glasses of wine are piling up. I’m getting by, but it’s not a plan for success. When the crisis passes, I’ll return to my typical lifestyle. I’m surviving but not thriving.

• Burnout: The ways I’m handling stress aren’t working or are even downright detrimental to my physical and mental well-being. I feel like I’m sinking and can’t turn things around. I may be feeding my addictive desires to numb myself, acting more aggressive with others, and my emotions are probably running out of control.

Like many of life’s challenges, we want to get ahead of burnout and resolve it when the symptoms are still manageable. This means being pro-active about our mental health and self-care when we feel ourselves starting to slip into the stagnation phase. I think of stress, and burnout like a snowball – when it’s just beginning to form at the top of the hill, it’s much easier to intervene and keep it from rolling downhill. When a burnout snowball is at the bottom of the slope, intervening can be more complicated, and even dangerous, because your once small snowball may now pack the punch of an avalanche.

How do you know when stress and burnout are reaching dangerous levels? I’ve listed some of the most common signs below.

• Tunnel vision: You can’t gauge situations or social interactions accurately and miss critical pieces of information.
• Loss of interest: Things you once found pleasurable lose their joy, making it more difficult to relax.
• Helplessness: You may feel overwhelmed to the point where you feel helpless to make any changes or to take action. You can’t prioritize like you once could or make even simple decisions easily.
• Mood changes: Depression, anxiety, and anger may increase. You may be feeling and acting more confrontational, isolating, or feeling more fearful, worried, or frustrated.
• Sleeping and eating: You find yourself over or under eating or sleeping, or just find that your typical habits are disrupted.
• Substance use: Your alcohol or drug use increases.
• Energy: You may feel an increase or decrease in energy and activity levels.

Now that you know what changes to watch out for, the next step is what to do when you recognize the signs of stress arising. In our next blog, I’ll discuss strategies to manage stress effectively, even when that feels like an impossible task.

The post Burned Out? Read This! appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

• Even if we can’t see someone we can ask Reflective Questions like: How are you holding up? What’s the toughest part of this for you? What’s helping you get through it? Who do you rely on for support? Has there been another time when you’ve been in a crisis and you handled it successfully? How did you do that?

• It’s going to take a concerted effort and a plan to remember to ask Reflective Questions because it’s easier to assume people are doing fine or we don’t want to sound intrusive or rock the boat and we’re all busy. Reflective Questions take time. Don’t make the mistake of asking them if you’re unavailable to listen. Their purpose is to open a pathway to a deeper dialogue.

• That means you need to honor the questions, the conversation and the relationship. If you review your emails or scan the internet while your colleague is talking on the phone you’ve broken the contract. You’re losing trust instead of building it. Don’t tell yourself they won’t know you’re reading your emails. They’ll figure it out. Instead turn away from your computer. Make sure you’re present and settle in. You’re asking your colleague a personal question. They deserve your attention.

• Concerned about sounding intrusive? Start off by talking about yourself. We’re all struggling. This is a time to show your vulnerability. We build a foundation for reflective conversations by being open, sharing our story, listening attentively and asking the right questions without judging.

• Talk about what’s been tough for you, mistakes you made, how you recovered, who you turned to for support and how you got through a crisis. Be transparent. Be humble. Be honest. Then ask, “What’s this been like for you?”

The post Are my colleagues stressed out? How would I know? appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

Dear Heather,

Below are a few ideas that might help. Let me know what you think.

Start with your vision. How do you envision your work community operating when associates return to work? Imagine there was a miracle and everything was running perfectly. What does that look like to you?

• Your leadership team is in agreement and you have a consensus about your protocols that everyone actively advocates. Your leaders need to be invested, enthusiastic and champions of your protocols. If anyone on your team is not committed you have a problem. Don’t plan to inspire associates to endorse and support your new protocols unless leaders are 100% onboard.

• How specific are the protocols? When will you reevaluate them? This comes down to what you want in your community. If you take a laissez-faire approach and encourage people to use good judgment keep in mind that your good judgment sounds like half baked gibberish to me. If your protocols are open to interpretation or overly flexible get ready for conflicts about how employees adapt to them. That might be acceptable to you. It’s your community. Maybe you don’t want to pressure people to stay six feet apart or you might decide everyone has to wear a mask in the office. It’s your call. You’ll never please everyone.

• Your protocols are based on your principles. What are they? Your associates want to know. Lead with your principles. Not everyone has to agree with them but they can respect them and follow them in the workplace.

• How do you roll out your protocols? What’s your plan? One memo? A video by the CEO? Local discussion groups in your offices? Zoom conferences? Phone calls?

• Spell out any ground rules about civility in the workplace. Clarify them in memos, emails, videos or Zoom presentations by the CEO and review them in small group discussions with managers.

• Expectations about self care. What are you doing to encourage self care for your associates? How are you going to boost morale in this crisis event? Be creative. Try things you haven’t done before.

• Accept that people are on edge. You don’t know what they’re going through. Some are doing fine. Some are depressed, anxious and more emotionally sensitive. They could be struggling with home schooling, marital issues or family conflicts. They need more support. Some are testy. Those in high risk groups or with family members who are vulnerable feel more threatened. Others are confident they have nothing to worry about. Some believe in physical distancing and others are convinced the threats of COVID 19 have been wildly exaggerated. Probably not the best idea to debate these issues in the workplace but it’s going to happen. Let your principles and protocols lead the way.

The post We disagree about social distancing at work: What do we do? appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

• Examine your bias and ask yourself if it makes sense as we transition to a post-lockdown world. Try to imagine life with some people working at home. What does that look like? Do you see any payoffs? Any hitches? What are the immediate, short term and long term consequences? What could go wrong? How would you remedy that?

• If you give the green light for people to work remotely who gets to stay home? Here’s where things can get murky. Make your decision by following your guiding principles. Be transparent and let everyone know your decision is based on your core values of what’s best for customers, the business and employees.

• Have a team meeting with managers and employees to put together a work-at-home policy based on key principles and outcomes. Decide how to measure its success. It’s an experiment. Policies can be revised.

• People will notice if anyone gets special treatment about working off site. If you don’t stick to your espoused principles you’ll raise questions about integrity and equity. You don’t want to go there.

• What are the boundaries? Can people live anywhere in the country? Do they need to live a certain distance from the office? How come? How often do they need to be at the office? Are there any non-negotiable items like meetings they must attend?

• Last week a manager asked “How do we make sure they’re getting the job done if they’re home?” I asked, “How do you hold people accountable now?” Be clear about your performance expectations and accountability standards. If someone isn’t measuring up, use your coaching and leadership skills to help them get back on track whether they’re home, at their favorite café or in the office. And lastly don’t forget to show appreciation and gratitude even when they’re not at the workplace. They may be out of sight but you haven’t forgotten them.

The post Why can’t I work at home? appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

• Have daily check-ins with yourself: Monitor yourself for signs of stress and increase your self-care accordingly. Symptoms of anxiety or depression can include a myriad of human responses. Still, a few major ones are: losing your appetite or eating unhealthily, not being able to sleep or over-sleeping, isolating, increased or decreased energy levels, a loss of pleasure in day-to-day activities, and an increase in substance use.

• Altruism: When we are altruistic, we have other’s best interests at heart. It’s a selfless consideration for our family, co-workers, colleagues, customers, friends, and neighbors. Altruism is an essential trait because we know that practicing altruism, compassion, and acts of generosity helps others, strengthens relationships, and lowers our own stress levels.

• Purpose: If you are feeling overwhelmed or even burnt out at work, try focusing on your mission. Reminding yourself of your ultimate purpose fuels your determination and boosts your morale and sense of accomplishment.

• Expectations of your leaders: Even leaders who make it seem like their achievements are effortless also experience stress in times of crisis and transition. Team members make positive contributions when they have fair, kind, and realistic expectations of their leaders. It might help to reach out to your manager and ask how he or she is holding up in these unsettling times. We can all use a dose of kindness.

• Self-Care: When team members are attending to their needs and self-care, it shows. Employees can show up and put their best efforts forward when they are supported. Self-care practices are tailored to each individual, so what works for you may not work for someone else. They include eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep and exercise, and connecting with others in meaningful ways. The most important thing about creating a self-care routine is consistency, and that what you are doing feels nourishing and rejuvenating to you. We all need to remember that we can’t fill up others’ cups if ours is running low or is empty.

The post What team members can do in crisis appeared first on Institute Of Respect.

The post Returning to the workplace: What’s your plan? appeared first on Institute Of Respect.